I am making out with Johnny Depp. I find myself in the backseat of a car with him and I'm having a crisis of conscience. He leans over to kiss me and I freeze with wide eyes (exactly like the scene in Back to the Future where Lorraine leans across the car at the dance to kiss Marty McFly) . "I am dating Dan," I think to myself. "I can't do this." Then Johnny asks me to come back to his hotel room and I agree. We encounter Dan on the way, and he is crestfallen. "But, honey, I love you!" He pleads. "I'm sorry, Dan," I reply. "It's Johnny Depp."