12.12.2006

Pot fueled dreams are the best

Trash filled the kitchen with a New England clam chowder stench.

But instead of retreating into my corner, I got down on my hands and knees and began rubbing the trash suggestively all over my hot body.

My roomie's empty milk carton? I rubbed that sonofabitch over my chest.
And if my roomies walked in, I would shoot them a come-hither stare.

"Whatcha doing, hon," I'd say as I rubbed the deflated box of frozen peas over my privates.

In real life, the catalyst for this dream was well, piled trash and pot.

Since myself and Kevin are the only ones who clean up the goddamn kitchen, I felt driven to ignore the stacked pizza boxes and encrusted dishes for oh, about a week. ("We'll see who breaks," I said to myself one night. "If these fucktards want to live in their own filth, by God, they will.")

But last night in RL (cough: real life), I walked into the stinking kitchen and said to myself, "I'm going to light up a doob."

So after watching god-awful Family Guy for an hour, the pot compelled me to clean the kitchen.

"You don't understand," I told my roomies in RL. "I'm bringing a sense of order into our apartment."

When passing down the hallways to the trash chute and peering up from behind a mound of rotting food, passersby would shoot me an informal greeting.

"Hey Joey, what's up?"

"Oh, nothing," I'd say. "I'm just bringing order to where there once was chaos."

They would shoot me a confused look as I continued to nutter on.

"You should try it sometime," I told them. "It's very liberating."

4 comments:

Petra said...

Hi,

Nice blog. I have been blog surfing (by hitting ‘next blog’ in the top of each blog) which brought me randomly to your blog, and it's proving extremely interesting.

Along with my blog and a few friends’ blogs, here is where I have blog surfed to recently:

Nissan

Ah Bugger

Auto

Hypernautz

Violet Rose

The Footy Club

Controlled Randomness

RasberryWillow

Need to Know

Simple Sphere

Para Sempre Zoação!

Knight Nation

Mazda News

Ryochiba

Boulder the Great

Blog Potato

Phoenix Fire

Clip Tip

Upside down, inside out, however you like it

where everythink is in its own place

I dream of Taco Bell

Heyl1 goes York!

Coolest Guy on the Planet

MEGAN FELLNER

A Nova Visão Do Futebol

Walking On Fire

BMW News

HitchHiker’s Omnibus

The Quiet Stone

milk money or not, here I come

America; The Freak

All Your House Are Belong To Us

Auto Blog

Fawlty Towers

Star Girl

This Is Not A Blog. It's A Golb.

Careers

Jodi

el sur tambien existe

Thinking about Lil' BGs

Jerusalem Jones

Lou’s Hideaway

Mercedes News

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Animals Are Our Equals

Movie Reviews

Phantasmagoria Under the Mad Moon

Jungle Doodles

Holy Smokes

Evolve Happy

Gluttonous Sins

Thoughts of a Delicate Mind

beautiful kisses

two4disney

m@’s life

Girlfriend Board of Review

Jerry in Berlin

100% Nicky

A Clear View To A New Life

Marissa Anich's Internet Blog

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Self Publish Blook ( Yes, Blook )

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A Place Called Cafe

Reason I Live

Gardening 1 on 1

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The Life Of MINDUCKOLS

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Monasticism

I’ll add your blog to my trail next. Bye!

Petra :)

theogeo said...

Petra, You are a clever spambot. Thanks for stopping by.

Joey, that's hilarious. Also, I hate Family Guy too. You didn't say you hate it, but you said it was God-awful. I concur.

TVonthefritz said...

I also remember accusing the 18-year-old young man who I smoked pot with of stealing my spoons. As compensation for his pot, I brought over vegan chili and dinnerware. But I forgot, that my spoons had been plastic. "I know that my spoons are around here somewhere," I told him while digging through his sink. Ten minutes later, I realized that my spoons had been plastic. Sorry I felt this warranted a phone call. "In the trash chute, I had an epihany (sp)," I told him. "Apparently, as I recall, you didn't take my spoons." I wasted thirty minutes over a goddamn spoon.

theogeo said...

Crap, kiddo, I missed your call. I checked in early. I'll give you a ring tonight.

You and your damn spoons!